strength in presence

i feel like awareness is important in cultivating our individual strength and endurance. not simply in the physical sense of building strength and resistance, or developing a stronger immunity. self awareness, is necessary in sitting with discomfort and pain. to try not to hide it or bury it; but rather an unspoken courage to remain in the knowing of it’s presence. to know that discomfort is there for this moment, it’s stinging, sharp, dulling, and nauseating existence. in the midst of head spinning vertigo, shortened breaths, quivering of shaking hands, clammy with sweat – this might appear to be not just challenging, but impossible – wishful thinking.

it is difficult; acknowledging it’s presence and saying ‘hey, i do not fear you, i’m not trying to shift. instead, let’s wait for you to pass when you’re ready’. this is something i can’t quite get the hang of yet, but it’s what i’m working towards.

focusing on it’s reoccurrence is seldom of much help – this only serves to instigate more worry and uncertainty into the future, which is not yet here. sinking into the depth of your discomfort will only seek to consume you. try, if and when you can to wander across the surface. in due time, steadying your mind with stillness – without trying to negate or distract yourself from the physical pinches. balance yourself on the level on which this pain resides. this may allow your thoughts to find a place, away from the anxious assumptions of what the future may hold.

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